I was never a person to give things away. Neither was I a person that would spend on others. In essence, my internal battle of becoming worse off by giving always won. It did not occur to me that giving is healing. It took many years to learn how to reciprocate to generosity. Logic, calculations and expectations are not part of it. The inherent good feeling arising from giving is total thankfulness and lightheartedness! When my apartment became furniture free, I was not devoid of any remorse, all alone in the empty space of the apartment. In reality, I enjoyed the sacred emptiness of tranquility. The stillness of space resonated so well with my state of being. Just BE.
When it was time to go through all my belongings, it was a challenge indeed. How should I use discernment to distinguish the worthy and the non-worthy? What does each of my personal belonging mean to me? All this time, it was not necessary to dispose them as the space was there, and there was no impetus to review my cumulative inventory! Confronted with time, space and budget, I shortlisted items that have high start-up cost in terms of time and money, and items that were not easily re-purchasable. Basically, a list of items that I actually need and are still useful to me now and will be later! If I had consciously made an effort to review the things around me, I would have lesser clutter. The space would open the door to reinforce my own center and be contented.
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